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  • Child Custody,  Family Court

    Preparing for Family Court

    I want to give you some helpful information on preparing for Family Court. Let’s say you’ve been served with divorce papers. Or, you get a petition to modify custody or access (anything that might change the parent/child relationship). Or, maybe you’re the one doing the filing. You need to prepare for court as far in advance as possible. Here are some of the things you’ll need to do: Hire an attorney. Make a commitment to keep your child(ren) out of the middle of any arguments the two of you may have and to refrain from speaking to them about court unless absolutely necessary and then in only the most general…

  • Coparenting

    Respect: An Integral Element of Co-Parenting

    Basically co-parenting boils down to “cooperative parenting” or parenting together. It is a firmly held belief with professionals that children fare better when parents can minimize any trauma during and after their divorce and can communicate, cooperate, and compromise with consistency. Respect is an integral element of co-parenting effectively. I realize not everyone ends their relationship amicably. It would be great for them and their children if that were possible, but unfortunately, it isn’t always. Co-parenting is even more difficult when a marriage ends with hostility. However, it is extremely important for your children that any animosity be put aside. You have to put your children’s needs and best interests…

  • Child Custody,  Coparenting

    Using Kids to Communicate With Your Ex – Don’t Do It

    A friend reported over-hearing a conversation between a mother and child recently. The mother was telling the child to tell her father things that basically the mother should have been discussing with him. And the child was telling the mom how the father wouldn’t listen to her as “that’s not what’s in the court papers”. I’d like to be able to say this hardly ever happens. But I can’t. During the past 20 years, I’ve often heard similar conversations myself or more tragically — children’s versions of these conversations. This is probably the second “wish” kids have who have parents involved in custody litigation. When I asked kids what they…

  • Child Custody,  Coparenting

    Social Media Is Not Always Your Friend

    Facebook, twitter, instagram, etc. can all be fun and entertaining. They have their uses. They’re great tools for building a business platform. Facebook is an excellent way to stay in touch or even get back in touch with family and friends. Interesting people and topics can be found daily. And, the cat videos! We love those, right? However, you should be careful what you post because it can come back and bite you in the… umm…nether region. Now don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to squash all your fun. But, if you’re a divorced/separated parent and posting pictures of yourself in a drunken stupor or high (although I don’t…

  • Child Custody,  Coparenting

    Toxic Relationships

    Let’s say you have a child with someone. And, that someone and you have an on again off again kind of relationship. One that sometimes gets very volatile. In most instances, it’s probably best that this relationship end and that you have as little to do with each other as possible. But, you have a child, so you still have to communicate and possibly see each other occasionally, so it will be difficult to say the least. I’m not talking about the normal end to a relationship where you’re hurt and angry, you might even say some things that are regrettable, but with time you’re able to move on. I’m…